Beginning!

It was midnight, the table lamp was lit; while I was busy doing the math sums. What fantasized me that night was the very consistency, which I had maintained while studying and dreaming. At equal intervals of time or when one theme overlapped the other. What made me sit that late at night were these two rhythms. My frustrations to study the subject that I maintained a distance from, and my temptations to dream of something magical; sustained me in the ocean of life, when both the mathematical sums and my imaginations served as a life jacket. Neither of the two could sense the love, without each other.

The imaginations are an open ocean, you can reach anywhere; simply by willing to be there, in your mind's brackets. When these brackets tend to support you, energize you; this no one knows or can ever quantify. I had been wishful to complete my high school and was willing to read what I liked, do what my life was all about. "I couldn't pretend any longer"; saying this I reached in a story of an actress who had gone on a war, to entertain those real heroes who weren't aware if life was present tomorrow. To the soldiers; every moment smiled as if it were to be their last. Surprisingly, they smiled back; they knew their job. I wanted to read literature from so long, I were dying to analyze what allured me; other than what didn't bother me but I was studying that, to merely pass in the exams. Life wasn't to take things for granted and doing them; but for the very fun of feeling the vibrations, examining the texture and composition of what meant to us everything and was the calling of our life. Only we could ascertain or know it the best.

School exams happened, I passed them and my marks gave me admission into a good college too. Now, it was about following the interest and cultivating it further; not following the crowd but my own lane. My people, wanted the best out of me and gave me suggestions to opt for other courses, whereas my calling had been well equipped in my mind and had become the passage towards my identity. What good could life give me, if I don't give it what belongs to it? I pondered gravely, and the thought appeared again and again like a revolutionary fire for me to answer. I kept my thoughts to myself and after prolonged periods of struggles with my own self and thoughts, I had got the meaning behind my life, my actions. When that meaning appeared, I could sense the glory of the growing sun, the way I could feel it in my childhood. I felt, the preciousness of every moment, when I read the Novels, Story books, because these were the passages to knowing myself and bringing the best out of me.

The innocence of childhood was dazzling in the rosary of my youth. "Love" was in the air; that connects a person with his intense, with his soul; so was I connected. I felt as if I were a child once again. I had decided that I would stand for my dreams, the ones that captivated me late nights and made me do the math sums with as much delight, in order to carve out my path. Now, I had got my love back with the growing crescendo of my dreams. I had known who I was, what marked my identity and it made a fresh beginning to my life.

Gagandeep Singh Vaid English(H) 1st Year, Dyal Singh College, University of Delhi 11/08/2013